Week 16 2014 Weekly Uniform Rankings

by Tim Brulia

16) Titans-Jaguars: TEN in white/navy, JAX in black/black. And so it appears that the Jags will shelve the teal jerseys for the 2014 season. A shame really. Would have helped this encounter immensely. As it is, much darkness with just the hint of teal and columbia blue to "brighten" things up.

15) Ravens-Texans: BAL in white/black, HOU in navy/white. Again, a rather blah matchup, but I do prefer that the Ravens went with black pants as opposed to an all white look. Red and purple and a hint of gold are good trim colors that do some salvaging of this matchup.

14) Broncos-Bengals: DEN in white/white, CIN in black/white. Rathr surprising of the Bengals to go at night with white pants when many teams, when presented with a dark pants option for primetime, choose dark. Not so this time, and with the opponent the rather bland Broncos all white look, it was a little disappointing. Both teams with some orange as a common denominator and the Broncos' navy as the dominant trim feature, it's just a bit blah for me.

13) Patriots-Jets: NE in white/navy, NYJ in green/white. The Jets, who normally rock green pants late in the season, haven't really embraced the concept this season. The green britches have only been seen three times this season and would have helped somewhat here. Alas, no dice. Still, some good colors in navy, green with chunks of silver and red.

12) Colts-Cowboys: IND in blue/white, DAL in white/mint. Many shades of blue here; bright, metallic, straight, etc. But, in modern form, much tradition here. And perhaps because of that, a rare move by this reporter, I will allow a traditional looking matchup a mulligan. It is pleasing to my eyes.

11) Browns-Panthers: CLE in white/brown, CAR in black/silver. What could have been. The Panthers eschew their last chance for the all blacks for 2014 with the carolina blue socks for the norm and I am really disappointed. But I cannot punish this game because of that. The Browns brown pants are the preferred choice to at least give this matchup some visual spark.

10) Falcons-Saints: ATL in white/white, NO in black/black. Utter monochromatic hum-drummery, but it does work somehow. I guess it the trim colors that save this from the gutter. Gold and red. Maybe the Saints could have used the gold pants, but this is what we have, and while it's not a wow job, it's OK.

9) Lions-Bears: DET in white/silver, CHI in navy/white. Of all the ancient rivals in the NFC North's uni matchups, this might be my least favorite. And that's saying something, because I dig almost all of them. But perhaps the honolulu's are just trim on the white jerseys, the Bears navys have nothing of note to bounce off with, I dunno. Still, it's better than many other encounters during any season.

8) Vikings-Dolphins: MIN in purple/white, MIA in white/white. Normally I decry the Fins in their all whites. But the opponent here is the Vikings, with the sweet essence of purple. And somehow, mixing two of the more unique and signature colors of these teams, the aqua trim gains some sense of decorum. True, the aqua pants might have shot this one onto medal placing for the week, but thanks to the Vikes, this is not a cellar dweller encounter.

7) Eagles-Redskins: PHI in white/green, WSH in burgundy/yellow. What a difference a pair of green pants make. Had this been played early in the season, it would have been hugely disappointing. With the green pants of the Eagles, it moves much higher in the food chain.

6) Seahawks-Cardinals: SEA in white/navy, ARZ in red/red. I think I'm beginning to understand the Cardinals late season uni MO or SOP or OP or BFD. All white or all red. No in between. The Seahawks wisely put the navy trousers on in response. The result is good. Loads of red against a navy dominant away look with neon green to fill any void.

5) Chiefs-Steelers: KC in white/red, PIT in black/yellow. While earlier opportunities for eye candy failed this season (see Carolina and Jacksonville), in this case the opportunity for uni misery was avoided. The Chiefs by sticking with red pants, avoid the horrid all white combo and I am so glad. This matchup is great, dominated by red, black and yellow. Not glamorous colors to be sure. But when mixed together the way these two do it, it's glorious.

4) Bills-Raiders: BUF in white/blue, OAK in black/silver. This is a nice one. A bunch of colors that  keep this one in the upper echelon for the week. The Bills make a rather routine red and blue color combo work so well, maybe better than ever. The Raiders black and silver, dull by nature,  seem to brighten in comparison.

3) Giants-Rams: NYG in white/gray, STL in throwback blue/yellow. The Giants throwbacks are their permanent uniform. The Rams throwbacks should be. The bright yellow accents on the navy helmet and the royal jerseys are fabulous. Even the white NOB against all the yellow keeps the yellow from being monotonous. The Giants red trim keeps the blue from overload. Great matchup!

2) Packers-Buccaneers: GB in white/yellow, TB in red/pewter. I really enjoy the mixture of colors and the way they bounce off each other here. The sharp red, dour pewter and bright strips of orange against the bright yellow and sturdy green. I feel this one. I feel it a lot!

1) Chargers-49ers: SD in white/navy, SF in red/gold. This is one of those cases where 1 + 1 = gravy. Distinct colors and trim put together create a really pleasing visual aesthetic. Navy, yellow and a wee bit of powder blue coupled with the bright red and gold is sweet.


As we are in the midst of the Holiday Season, we hope all of you GUD followers had a joyous and festive Christmas and here's wishing all the best of 2015!


1 comment:

  1. Hope your holidays are being good to you.

    The sour cream:

    MIN-MIA: the only time the Dolphins have ever won aqua against the Vikings was SB VIII and a preseason game I saw on ABC in 1978.

    CLE-CAR: the brown pants just ruin this matchup.

    BAL-HOU: the only time these two teams both wore what I wanted in Houston was Week 15 of '02

    TEN-JAX: fugly all the way around

    PHI-WAS: Eagles in green pants - no bueno

    ATL-NO: last time these two both wore what I wanted in NO was Week 7 of '07

    SEA-ARI; both teams in the wrong pants

    9 games were eligible this week:

    9. IND-DAL: both of them wore what I wanted but not very inspiring

    8. DEN-CIN: I forgot that the Bengals wore orange against JAX earlier this year and was going to break that out Monday night. This matchup would look better in daylight

    7. NE-NYJ: 2nd year in a row that both Pats-Jets games were correct.

    6. DET-CHI: always liked when the Bears wear their regular stuff at home against the Lions. Looked good when Charlie Weaver was trying to chase down a young Sweetness, when the 46 D was harassing Eric Hipple; when Barry Sanders was trying to streak past Mark Carrier, and still does today.

    5. SD-SF: delightful set of contrasting uniforms

    4. KC-PIT: two years ago the Chiefs went into Heinz and not only injured Big Ben, but went all white. Thankfully they didn't this time.

    3. GB-TB: first time in 11 years the Bay of Pigs was both how I wanted it in Tampa

    2. NYG-STL: remember, the Rams in their blue and gold is the one throwback I don't rate as sour cream, since they flatly refuse to wear gold pants as part of their regular uni - ever.

    1. BUF-OAK: thrilled to see the Bills in blue pants, especially since they blew it the previous two weeks. Nice color contrast. Looked like Joe Ferguson escaping Phil Vilapiano.

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