Week 15 2014 Weekly Uniform Rankings

By Tim Brulia

Chances are, if you are reading this week's installment, you are not out Christmas shopping. Good. You need a break. So, let's hop on the GUD Uniform Ranking Express!

16) Dolphins-Patriots: MIA in white/white, NE in navy/silver. Oh dear. Dolphins continue to waste opportunities to grab those wonderful aqua pants for the yawning all whites. I don't understand. Would have paired really well against the standard and solid navy over silver of the Pats.

15) Broncos-Chargers: DEN in white/white, SD in navy/white. Too much navy and too much white help to make the spirits blight. Where trim colors, such as maybe more orange, more yellow and/or more powder blue would make the spirits bright.

14) Jaguars-Ravens: JAX in white/black, BAL in purple/black. Oh for the love of black. The Ravens' purple over black is a unique and exciting combo. But matched with the Jags love of black pants, it gets caught in the crossfire.

13) Bengals-Browns: CIN in white/black, CLE in brown/brown. All that chocolatety goodness. All that black pants sleekness. Hmph. A little too much of the dark side. I think the all browns would work better against a team that didn't look so similar.

12) Cardinals-Rams: ARZ in white/white. STL in navy/white. I'm not sure I understand the Cardinals' choices. Last week, all red against the red heavy Chiefs. This game? All white against the Rams with white trousers. Puzzling. Red pants would have been excellent. But the Rams navy over white looks better to me every week. Push.

11) Saints-Bears: NO in white/black, CHI in navy/white. Mixed feelings on this one. I sorta think the Saints did right by wearing the black britches, but...then again, would the gold trunks have been a better fit against the Bears navy-white. Or....maybe the Bears in a ready for prime time all navy look? I guess indecisiveness wins here. It's good, but...gee...

10) Raiders-Chiefs: OAK in white/silver, KC in red/white. Since 1963, the ONLY time we did not see this matchup was in 1980, when the Chiefs decided to go WAH. Which likely makes this the most common uni matchup of all-time. And something should be said for that, I reckon. But as far as a visual treat, it's nothing special. There are better, and there are certainly worse.

9) Redskins-Giants: WSH in white/yellow, NYG in blue/gray. Unlike the aforementioned OAK-KC rivalry, this one goes back even longer, but so many more differing looks than that one. So, more variety, but not necessarily better. In this case though, slightly better. A better distribution of color and trim. Burgundy, red, blue, yellow and gray.

8) Buccaneers-Panthers: TB in white/white, CAR in black/silver. What sparks this one up the map? The Bucs orange socks! Socks are almost always the overlooked element in a uni matchup, but when done right, it helps a lot. Now if the Panther had chosen to go with carolina blue socks...I can't even imagine!

7) Texans-Colts: HOU in white/navy, IND in blue/white. I think in previous years, I was wishy-washy on this matchup. This year, I dig it. Perfect yin-yang. You take the white helmet, I'll take the navy. You have the blue jersey, I gots the white. You do the white pants, I rock the navy. And I'll add a dash of red to boot.

6) Cowboys-Eagles: DAL in white/mint, PHI in green/white. Wait a minute, didn't these guys just play each other? Yeah, Late Thanksgiving Day! But in that one, the Cowboys wore their non-whites at home. This time, the more usual white over mint combo, with the Eagles in green over white. The nightmare early non-green unis of Philly just a bad distant memory. Always a nice clean pairing.

5) 49ers-Seahawks: SF in  white/gold, SEA in navy/navy. Wait another minute, didn't these guys just play each other, too? Yeah, Thanksgiving night! Well, with the rematch so close at hand, the Seahawks wear an outfit much more appealing than the grays that were so difficult to see, their neat-o navys. The Niners with the gold helmets and pants with red trimmed white jerseys, just looks a bit better than a short while ago.

4) Steelers-Falcons: PIT in white/yellow, ATL in red/white. Triple combo vs. triple combo. I always like to give high marks for such matchups, and I do here, despite the fact that black and white are two common denominators at play here. The Falcons red and Steelers yellow do bounce nicely off each other. Well done.

3) Vikings-Lions: MIN in white/purple, DET in honolulu blue/silver. One of my favorite annuals matchups, as long as the Vikes go with purple...and they do. The sweet taste of purple mixed with a hint of yellow against the wondrous shade of honolulu blue and dollops of silver with a kiss of black.

2) Jets-Titans: NYJ in green/green, TEN in white/navy. We haven't seen this much WAH out of the Tennessee bunch since their days as the Tennessee Oilers (1998 & 1999). One good thing about that is this game. It brings out the Jets in mono-green, a look detested but many, but liked a lot by me, and the Titans in navy pants. When both sides have white helmets, it's my believe that they should compensate making full use of their colorways. In this case, affirmative on both sides.
Nice to meet you, old friend.
1) Packers-Bills: GB in white/yellow. BUF in blue/blue. Lordy. I love Buffalo blue. I like Packer green and yellow. So the Bills go all blue with this set and for once, a white helmet looks glorious. Couple with lots of Packer yellow with green trim this becomes a gem of its time. Boy o boy!!

Next week? Yeah, we'll be here. See ya!

1 comment:

  1. First of all, wish nothing but good things to you and your loved ones in this last response before Christmas Day.

    Now, the sour cream and the ranked games.

    NYJ-TEN: so many things wrong with this. The Titans don't play in a city that's warm in December. So them going WAH denies me of seeing them in their colors. Even them in dark blue tops and white pants would be acceptable, even though I prefer the Columbia blue tops with white pants, and CB on dark blue pants is acceptable for me. And the Jets in all green makes me green around the gills. Just like taking a bite into a taco with . . . sour cream.

    GB-BUF: so disappointed. Had the Bills just stayed with white pants, that game would have been #1 for me.

    CIN-CLE: both teams in dark pants - yikes.

    JAX-BAL: if both teams had been in white pants, would have been around 5 of 6.

    MIN-DET: Vikings just won't have a road game in the rankings until they ditch their purple pants.

    NO-CHI: does Sean Payton now just hate his players wearing gold pants?

    TB-CAR: had the Bucs donned pewter pants, would have been a great looking game.

    ARI-STL: Rams in gold pants would have been a visual treat. But, le sigh.

    Now the food I can actually eat.

    8. DEN-SD: both teams with really dark navy, but the Broncos with hints of orange and the Bolts with hints of yellow make it edible. But that's where SD in their Fouts era unis would have contrasted great with Denver's unis.

    7. HOU-IND: correct unis for both. Each team had plenty of blue, but it was differing shades of blue. Plus Houston had red numerals. So year after year, except '09, these two looked good when meeting in Naptown.

    6. DAL-PHI: probably the last time we'll see the Iggles in their midnight green, which contrasts well with Dallas' traditional unis.

    5. MIA-NE: when on the road, the Dolphins unis have plenty of aqua for me that the uni contrasts well with so many others.

    4. OAK-KC: same spot I had these two when they met on the Left Coast 3 weeks before, and only because there are just 3 I like better. This matchup looks just as good as when the cast of characters were Lamonica, Dawson, Davidson, Lanier, Shell, Upshaw, Bell, Culp, Livingston, Stabler, Branch, Podolak, Cherry, Plunkett, Spani, Carson, Paige, Okoye, Hostetler, Kaufman, Gannon, Green, Holmes, etc.

    3. SF-SEA: one of the best annual looks. When it looked at it's best was last year's NFC Title tilt. But just about always a great look when they get together in the Emerald City.

    2. WAS-NYG: good that the Giants went with gray pants. Four of the last five years Washington has went to East Rutherford and the two teams acquitted themselves well.

    1. PIT-ATL: these two wearing their regular unis, with the colors they have - it just sparkled before my eyes.



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